(to the tune of “I am Woman”)
WARNING: This song is not for the faint of heart!!
I am Routier, hear me roar
‘Cause I’m just too foul to ignore
And I bear the scars of Thirty Years of War;
I’ve got gout in me legs
And my teeth are blackened pegs,
But I’ll always find some comfort at the keg.
Oh, yes! I’m a thug, and I’m paid to dish out pain,
And yes, I’ll pay the price, but look how much I’ve gained,
If I’m paid to, I will do anything…
I am tough! (Tough!)
I am invincible (Invincible!)
I am Routier!
And When cannon’s mouths do roar,
And Imperial eagles soar,
Above the swaying mass of fighting men,
Then you’ll find me at the back
Of a furious attack,
Marching with my ashen pike on high;
Oh, yes! I am brave, but it’s courage brewed in beer
Yes! After a few jugs, I know there’s nought to fear,
If I’m drunk enough, I will fight anyone…
I am drunk! (Drunk!)
I am invincible! (Invincible!)
I am Routier!
And when the battle’s won
And the foe is on the run,
Then it’s time for all good soldiers to have fun….
Then I’ll get among the sluts
In the baggage trains and huts
And vent my lust between a young girl’s legs;
Oh, Yes! I am Gross, but it’s grossness born of need,
And yes! I’ll pay the price when my penis starts to bleed.
When I’m lustful, I will f*ck anything!
I am lewd! (Lewd!)
I’ve got syphilis! (Syphilis!)
I am Routier…….
©1989 Pierre La Bosche
One of the most well-known Routier songs, this may well be Pierre’s finest effort. It is as thoroughly disgusting to listen to as it is fun to sing, and is known as far and wide as the Routiers themselves are known. If we had a companie song, this would be it. Halleluleuh!